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EFT Intensive: INVEST in What Matters Most

  • What Is It?

    EFT Intensives are an opportunity to focus exclusively on your relationship without distraction for solid, uninterrupted chunks of time. You turn your phone on silent, leave work and the kids and the busyness of everyday life to someone else (if you can!), book a B&B and some cosy restaurants, and turn your attention to the thing that matters most - your relationship.

    This minimises the ‘whiplash’ of trying to switch out of work mode and into very personal (and sometimes painful) conversations, and back into work mode by the end of the hour. There is no clock-watching, no waiting a week to continue something we’re right in the middle of - some things need more than an hour! We can dive as deeply as needed into the important things and stay there until we’re at a natural stopping point. It’s all about YOU.

  • What's Involved?

    For many people, an intensive is a part of a bigger plan. By the time we meet in Newcastle, we’ll have worked together to identify which focus is the best fit for your needs, agreed on appropriate goals and expectations, and completed whatever preparation is needed to maximise our time. That way, when you get to Newcastle we can hit the ground running and make the most of our time together.

    Each day we will spend 2 hours in the morning before taking a break to eat, reflect, regroup & recharge (additional exercises for Type A personalities included), and then another 2 hours after lunch to dig into things in a way that dives deep, builds on the progress made, but still gives you time to integrate so you don’t get overloaded.

    • This is the equivalent of months of therapy and is appropriate whether. . .
    • Your relationship is in deep distress
    • You’re reeling from a recent big event - like an affair. An intensive can be a powerful start to a journey of healing
    • Your connection just needs a tune-up, and this is the format that fits best for your busy or unpredictable schedule
    • You’re a therapist and need to work on your own relationship away from your clients and your professional community
  • What Happens Before / After?

    Before

    Once you’ve decided to proceed, you’ll pay a $600 assessment fee and we’ll schedule two 60-minute online sessions, one for each partner. You will be sent online assessment questionnaires to be filled out before the online individual assessment sessions. In these sessions, we’ll further assess and prepare by clarifying realistic goals and expectations. Unless we identify any red flags, then the intensive will be scheduled. You’ll be billed 50% of the outstanding intensive fee, with the remainder payable within 7 days of the intensive. You’ll also receive a copy of the book Hold Me Tight, and it’s highly recommended that you read this in preparation for the intensive.

    The Weekend Of

    For the intensive itself, you’ll arrive at Thrive Wellness Hub around 10am each day and follow the EFT map toward your identified goals for two solid, uninterrupted chunks of time (minimum 2 hours morning & afternoon). At the end of each day, we’ll review progress towards those goals, and again at the end of the intensive.

    After

    There will be a final followup session within 2-4 weeks of the intensive where the next steps are identified, whether that includes at-home maintenance, ongoing work with another therapist, an enrichment workshop, or further intensives.

  • How Long Does it Take?

    There are two lengths offered: a three-day intensive, or a single-day intensive.

    The three-day intensive includes:

    • Minimum 12 hours in-person therapy over three days - Saturday, Sunday and Monday
    • Each day includes a two hour morning session, a two hour afternoon session and structured exercises to work on between sessions. Our sessions may go longer than two hours where needed
    • Includes two 60 minute online preparation sessions (one for each partner) and one 60 minute online followup session (together)

    The one-day intensive includes:

    2x  2-hour sessions a Monday. For couples, this option is only available for current clients or as a top-up if you have attended an intensive in the last year.

For Couples: Determining Your Ideal Goals and Focus

The goal and expectations for your intensive will depend on your hoped-for outcome. There are four general (sometimes overlapping) areas of focus: Therapy, Enrichment, Discernment, and Decoupling.

  • Therapy

    If your goal is to improve your relationship, or if you’ve suffered a devastating trust injury (like the disclosure of an affair), therapy may be the main focus for you.

    Grounded on the science of attachment and emotion, the goals of Emotionally Focused Therapy might be summarised as:

    1. unlearning old habits of relating that aren’t working for you
          and THEN
    2. learning new habits of relating to build closeness and trust
          and THEN (if needed)
    3. healing old hurts that are stopping you from feeling close or trusting.

    Research shows that the process tends to need to go in this approximate order - like learning to crawl before we can walk.

    To improve your relationship

    We’ll identify what’s going on currently so we know where to begin. For some, our time is best spent exclusively working to discover and understand old habits of relating, which we call ‘stabilising.’ Others may proceed to building new ways of relating that foster closeness and trust. 

    If you’ve suffered a trust injury

    If you're at critical mass, you may need a lot of help fast! An intensive can be a powerful beginning to a journey of healing. The good news is that we know how to repair those injuries. In fact, research shows that when we can do this, relationships can not only heal, but actually strengthen and improve. If you’re working with another therapist and/or your relationship has stabilised to the point that you can manage difficult emotions enough to engage in the healing process, our intensive goal will be to do just that. If your relationship has not yet stabilised, then it isn’t yet possible to engage in the healing process. Our intensive goal will be to get you to that point as soon as we possibly can.

    Whatever our focus is, the intensive will work best with consistent and intentional follow-ups to integrate the changes made in your relationship into the ‘real world.’ Practice is always needed to turn new habits into old habits. Some people can do this for themselves, but many of us need ongoing support until the new way of relating has become a habit, and all of the ‘problem’ issues are resolved.

  • Enrichment

    If your relationship is in good-to-great shape and you’re looking to enrich, fine-tune, or address something specific, then our goals will be to learn tools to D.I.Y. your relationship maintenance & repair, then practice using these tools. Our work will follow the Hold Me Tight EFT enrichment program. This process can stand alone without needing preparation or follow-up from a therapist.

  • Discernment

    Discernment is helpful if one or both of you are not sure if you’re in or out of your relationship. It is crucial that both partners understand and agree on the intended purpose and goal up front. This is an excruciating place to be in, and most people resist seeking help for many different, but valid, reasons. If this describes your situation, then the focus of our intensive would be:

    1. To make sense of how your relationship got to where it is now
    2. Identify what - if anything - might change your situation for the better

    The goal of this kind of intensive is to have a greater understanding of your relationship as well as greater clarity on how to proceed (engaging in therapy, continue as before, or exit the relationship).

  • Decoupling

    If one or both of you have already decided to end the relationship, this is your focus. It is crucial that both partners understand and agree on the intended purpose and goal up front. This can be the opportunity to gain some closure to your relationship as you know it. Our goals would be to make sense of how your relationship evolved to this point, gain that closure, and possibly redefine it in a healthy way (e.g. friends or co-parents). This is an opportunity to learn more about yourself - your own raw spots, blind spots, and things that will help you understand and manage your own self moving forward. It also allows you to plan a united way of communicating this important news to significant others - especially if you have children together.


For Individuals

An intensive can be indicated for individuals for a number of situations. Some of the common reasons are

  • I want to understand myself - my emotions, my habits - and my own attachment/relationship style
  • I need to process and heal specific events or themes (current or past)
  • I want to come to a decision about how to proceed in my relationship - am I in or out?
  • My relationship is in distress, but my partner isn’t interested in counselling
  • I need help making a difficult life decision
  • I need support after a relationship has ended

An intensive can be useful when working on a specific area of focus. Whether it can stand alone will, of course, depend on your situation. Sometimes a one-day intensive (5 hours on a Monday) is the best fit for an individual. This will be discussed during the initial Zoom chat.

how much does it cost?

The fee for the EFT Intensive includes;

  • written materials to track your progress
  • a copy of the book "Hold me Tight: Seven Conversations for a lifetime of love" (couples only)
  • intake and assessment
  • one 60 minute individual online assessment session per person
  • the EFT Intensive sessions (as described above). 
  • one 60 minute online follow up session (couples only)

Click here for our current list of fees

THINKING ABOUT BOOKING?

The first step is to schedule a no-charge 15-30 minute Zoom call with CoupleWorks by clicking the button below. For couples, both partners are required to attend this call.

After this call, I will send you an email with the next steps, which will involve:
-Filling out assessment questionnaires.
-Scheduling a 60-minute assessment each (online or via phone call).